Best Monkey Rockers (Sex Gliders)

No emotions, no complications – just really great sex, on your own terms. Does that sound awesome to you? Well, meet Sex Gliders! Sex gliders, also known as monkey rockers, let you have penetrative sex without another person involved… unless you want someone to watch you, of course!

A sex machine of this type truly has the power to transform your sex and bring you the orgasms you may be lacking in your life. Sex gliders exist in a few different shapes and forms and of various quality, too, of course.

Whether it’s solo play or having your partner watch you pleasure yourself that does it for you, finding the right one can feel like a challenging task. That’s why we’ve created this comprehensive guide to help you find the top Monkey Rockers that are worth your money.

In this buying guide, we’ve picked out our favorite sex gliders, and we’re telling you all about why they’re our favorites and what makes them so great. If you are interested in buying a sex glider but not sure where to start, this guide will help you find one that’s right for you. After that, we’ll go through a few common questions to help you get the hang of sex gliders. But first, let’s define a monkey rocker.

What Exactly Is A Monkey Rocker (Sex Glider)?

Although you may not have seen one before, monkey rockers have been rising in popularity in the last few years, and for excellent reason, if you ask us. As I am sure you have realized by now, a monkey rocker is a sex machine that lets you have penetrative sex without a partner. It’s ideal for solo play, but you can also play together with a partner if you both wish to.

We use the terms monkey rocker and sex glider pretty much interchangeably. You may also hear variations of “sex glider,” like “love glider.” Another way to describe this type of sex machine is a self-pleasuring chair.

Sex gliders exist in different forms, but most often, they function like a type of padded seat that you sit on with a rocking mechanism and an attached dildo. Three major parts make up a sex glider – the platform you sit on, the rocking body, and the attached dildo. Some are manual, meaning that your movements will create the thrusts, while others are automatic and are controlled through an app or remote control.

Our 5 Best Monkey Rockers

Now that we’ve gone through what one is, we can go on to look at the best products currently on the market. Without further ado, here are the absolute best monkey rockers to utterly rock your world!

Cloud 9 F-slider Pro Heavy Duty Self Pleasuring Chair

Our Top Choice

Cloud 9 Self Pleasuring ChairWho needs a man when you’ve got this bad boy? You can officially start living your very best single life—no more worries about broken condoms, or STDs, or a disappointingly short 30 seconds. Keep going until you get there with this self-pleasuring chair from Cloud 9.

With soft, oversized cushioned seats, you are in for a comfortable ride.

With this self-pleasuring chair, you decide the tempo, the duration, and even the size and shape of the dildo. The Cloud 9 F-slider Pro Heavy Duty Self Pleasuring Chair comes with a dildo of its own to use or lets you attach any other suction dildo of your choice.

This monkey rocker is suitable for everyone up to 400 lbs. It’s also adjustable, so you can adjust the angle to precisely what you like. The handle makes it even easier to use and control.

Then there is the part none of us like thinking about: the price. This product isn’t cheap, and with its quality comes a pretty high but reasonable price tag. Although this Self Pleasuring Chair is a bit pricey, it’s very durable and could easily last you a lifetime.

If you decide to purchase this favorite Self Pleasuring Chair, you will also get some bonus accessories. This bonus kit includes a Vac-U-Lock adapter and universal dildo mounting straps so that you can use the sex glider with any dildo, a 7″ realistic dildo, and a storage cover.

PROS:

  • Works with any suction cup dildo
  • Controlled by your body movements
  • Silent operation
  • Comfortable seating

CONS:

  • A bit pricey

Who is this love glider most suitable for?

To put it simply – everyone! The F-slider Pro Heavy Duty Self Pleasuring Chair from Cloud 9 is our top choice because it is suitable for everyone. In short, it’s a high-quality, comfortable, and durable monkey rocker with near silent operation.

Save Over $100 On The Cloud 9 F-Slider Pro

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The Cowgirl Premium Riding Sex Machine

The Premium Choice

Cowgirl Premium ImageIf you’re really in this looking for the best premium product to maximize your pleasure, the Cowgirl Premium Riding Sex Machine may be the one for you. Through incredible vibrations and 360° swivel rotation, it provides you with the ultimate sex experience.

The two riding attachments that come with your purchase are entirely made of silicone and it lets you choose if you want external or internal stimulation. One of the attachments is flatter and textured, providing you intense clitoral stimulation. The other one has an insertable, slightly curved probe for stimulating you on the inside. The pleasurable vibrations can go up to 1200 RP. There are six different patterns and speeds of vibrations to enjoy.

The vibrations are controlled by either a remote control or the free app. The remote control has a range of only 3 meters, while the app can be used from up to 30 meters. If you enjoy letting your partner take over control while you are stimulating yourself, The Cowgirl Premium Riding Sex Machine can effortlessly be connected to their device.

The name “Cowgirl Premium Riding Sex Machine” is suitable, with the design of the monkey rocker looking similar to that of a horse saddle. This robust machine can hold a weight of up to 181 kg, or 400 lbs.

Now that we’ve talked about the good things, we’ll also take a quick look at the less desirable qualities that still must be addressed.

For starters, the not-so-subtle motor. Not only is this Cowgirl Sex Machine going to make you scream, but it produces quite a lot of noise on its own too. If you’re looking for a more discrete option, I’d advise you to scroll on a little and take a close look at number 4 on the list. The second drawback to this sex machine is the price. This sophisticated monkey rocker also comes with a high price, which only is to be expected considering the quality and build of the device.

PROS:

  • Works for both internal and external stimulation
  • It can be controlled either by remote control or by the app
  • Choose between 6 different vibration patterns and speeds

CONS:

  • Noisy
  • Expensive

Who is this love glider most suitable for?

If you want the ultimate ride and have a high budget, this one is for you. It’s also a good pick for those who prefer clitoral stimulation as it can stimulate you externally, unlike most other sex gliders that focus solely on internal stimulation.

Check Latest Price Of The Cowgirl Sex Machine

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Sex Machine Portable Thruster

Best Budget Choice

Portable ThrusterLooking for something a bit more affordable but still of excellent quality? The Sex Machine Portable Thruster has got you. Not only is it cheaper than many of its competitors, but it’s also really versatile.

The unique design of this sex machine also lets you adjust the angle very well, allowing you to decide precisely how you want it to happen. The penetration arm is 100% adjustable so that you can find just the right angle for maximum pleasure. You can, of course, hold onto the remote control yourself, but it can also make for a fun game to hand it over to your lover. With a full range from slow to fast, all the way up to 195 strokes per minute, this sex machine offers incredible performance.

You’ll get it fully assembled, making it easy to start enjoying yourself right away. All you have to do is screw on the suction cups and put on the dildo. Thanks to the small size, you can choose to use the lightweight machine on the bed or behind. The handle makes it easier if you decide to use it squatting directly overhead.

This love glider doesn’t give us anything to complain about. It’s portable, it’s reasonably priced, and it’s powerful. A bonus is that it also comes with an extra 6.5″ realistic dildo.

PROS:

  • Reasonable price
  • Compatible with all Vac-U-Lock dildos
  • Powerful but compact
  • Fully adjustable thruster arm

CONS:

  • None

Who is this love glider most suitable for?

If you want a sex glider with a motor for the best price, you found your perfect fit. This sex machine is also very compact and highly adjustable, making it easy to use. In short, it’s a fuss-free, thrusting machine for women who wish to control their pleasure to the max.

Save Over $100 On The Portable Thruster

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LoveBotz Love Glider Manual Rocker Sex Machine

Best For Quiet Rocking

Love Glider Sex Machine If you have housemates you’d rather not disturb while you’re getting it on, this super-silent Love Glider may be something for you. It won’t make a sound or squeak, although you may have trouble keeping quiet as you work yourself towards the big O.

Just like our top choice, LoveBotz Love Glider Manual Rocker Sex Machine lets you control the thrusts through your own body movements. Its padded seat gives you a comfortable seat to work with.

As it comes fully assembled, there’s no hassle at all setting it up. The fun begins as soon as the package with the LoveBotz Love Glider Manual Rocker Sex Machine shows up at your door.

PROS:

  • Completely silent operation
  • Compatible with Vac-U-Lock dildos

CONS:

  • Somewhat expensive

Who is this love glider most suitable for?

This love glider is for anyone who wants a sex glider without fuss. LoveBotz Love Glider doesn’t have any cords to get in the way. It functions smoothly and quietly. On top of that, it comes fully assembled, so you don’t have to stress about setting it up.

Check Latest Price Of The LoveBotz Love Glider

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Cloud 9 Pro 3 Sex Machine

Best Compact Monkey Rocker

Cloud Pro 3 imageThis fun and powerful toy got our bonus spot on the list. Unlike many others, it’s not a pleasure chair but rather a propelling arm that does the penetration.

Despite its meager size, it provides mighty thrusts and stands steadily. The smaller size also makes it easy to slide under the bed when you’re not using it.

It is fully adjustable–the angle, the depth, and the speed. You can adjust the thrust length through the flywheel knob.

The remote control controls the speed of the thrusts without effort on your part.

The motor is heavy duty with powder-coated steel component, giving it a long-life engine that will please you for decades.

It stays in its place with the four heavy-duty suction cups that are fastened on the floor during use. It keeps the machine from walking while you use it.

PROS:

  • Good value for money
  • Works with any dildo
  • Adjustable and versatile

CONS:

  • Still quite expensive

Who is this love glider most suitable for?

If you prefer to be lying down and effortlessly enjoying the penetration rather than bouncing your way to an orgasm, this love glider is the one for you. The small size also makes it more portable, and its various adjustable aspects make it suitable for the user who wants it her way without compromises.

Check Price & Claim Free Starter Kit With The Pro 3

FAQ – Frequently Asked Questions About Sex Gliders

Are manual or automatic sex gliders better?

If you’ll want a manual or an automatic sex glider depends entirely on personal preference and what you’re looking for. Often you might like a manual sex glider as it allows you to control the tempo and depth through your body movements easily. Still, if you’re playing with a partner, you might enjoy handing over the controls to him or her through an automatic.

In short, a manual sex glider is better if you want to control the thrusting yourself (and get a workout in while you’re at it), while an automatic sex glider is better if you wish to let someone else control the thrusting.

How much does a sex glider cost?

How much you can expect to pay for a sex glider depends on the model and the quality you choose. Generally, though, sex gliders are pretty expensive and understandably so–it’s a piece of special furniture, after all. Don’t expect to pay any less than at least a few hundred dollars.

Does a sex glider need any maintenance?

Besides cleaning the sex toys after each use, there is nothing you need to do to maintain your sex glider. You might want to clean up the seat with a wet wipe if you got especially sweaty during your session, but besides that, you can pretty much just use it when you want and put it away when you don’t.

Can I use a sex glider for anal penetration?

You can. A sex glider will work excellently for penetrating yourself both anally and vaginally. However, it’s important to remember not to use the same dildo switching from anal to vaginal without thoroughly cleaning the toy in between. Switching from anal to vaginal without cleaning the dildo could lead to a urinary tract infection, and no one wants that.

Can I use a sex glider as a male?

Gender doesn’t matter. Nothing is stopping you! Love gliders aren’t designed to stimulate your penis effectively, but for men who crave some g-spot action, monkey rockers will be ideal.

Monkey Rockers – The verdict

Is it worth the purchase? Most who have made the splurge would say yes. A monkey rocker can perform in a way another person could never and bring you the g-spot orgasms of your dreams. A sex glider can give you sex whenever you get the urge for it.

We wouldn’t recommend you throw away your man just yet, though. He may not have the sexual performance a sex glider has, but I am willing to bet he is way better at cuddling and being intimate. But watch out for new articles, and we’ll let you know once they bring us a sex glider that’s also suitable for cuddling.

In all seriousness, it can be quite hard to choose a sex glider. Your best bet is just to read through the descriptions and select the one that sounds like it most would suit your personal needs. All the sex gliders on our list are of high quality and will last you a long time once you buy them, so take the time you need to make a decision. And once you’ve made your choice… well, just let the sex glider revolutionize your sex life and enjoy the ride!

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